There Are No Twinkies On Grove

I have many friends from many walks of life.  I like that. 

Still, I don’t mind being alone, actually sometimes I embrace it. I could go for days without talking to folks and live happily in my own world. Perhaps, that’s why when some friends come to visit, it triggers spontaneous combustions in my head.

Take last Thursday.  A friend, let’s name him Bill, came to visit. He had been announcing the upcoming visitation for close to three weeks . He was concerned about my recovering leg and wanted to check in on me. 

On Tuesday, Bill texts me to ask whether Wednesday instead of Thursday works for the visit.

 I text him back and tell him it’s ok, but, to come after 1PM.

Bill texts back saying “it’s perfect, I can go to the gym and come to your house for lunch.” This is apparently code for “Make me lunch.”

 On Wednesday, I take care of my Physical Therapy leg needs and afterwards hobble out to pick up some food for Bill for the appointed visit time.  Disabled as I am, I take longer than expected, shopping and making black bean soup, so I text Bill and tell him not to show up until 1:30PM.

Bill  texts back  “can we make it for tomorrow, I got busy with a project and I’m meeting with some people now”

Really?! Am thinking this is not so cool, but, I text back “No worries. Happy you’re working. I won’t be around tomorrow until mid afternoon.”

Bill texts: “cool that can work”.

Thursday comes around.  I go to Physical Therapy, come home and then Bill arrives.

I serve him day-old-black-bean soup.  Bill seems to enjoy it, except he can't help making comments about how long it needs to be reheated in the microwave. He adds 3 more minutes to the 2 minutes I had already selected.  Afterwards he sits down to eat his  microwave-reheated-black-bean soup and we talk. 

We talk about a lot of different things, including the recovery of my leg, however, the emphasis is on Bill’s project.

Bill’s project is what keeps coming up during most of the visit. Bill is on his IPhone C and my MacBook Pro wheeling/dealing with clients and vendors for the event he’s planning.

What can I say? I’m happy Bill is working and doing something he seems to like. But on my time?!

After an hour of visiting and talking on the phone and using my laptop, Bill announces that he’s hungry and needs a snack.  Being the health nut that I am, I have no “snacks” on hand. So, I ask what he’s craving for and he says “Twinkies”.  Off we go onto Grove Street, in search of junk food.

There are no Twinkies on Grove.  We walk on either side of the street, into the Korean’s, the several Pakistani newssie/delis and… no Twinkies.  However, as we approach Columbus Avenue he sees the Dunkin Donuts…Dope!!!   This will satisfy the jones.  A gigantic bucket sized Iced tea and 2 donuts later we’re on our way home.

When we stop at a corner waiting for a light to change I press the button. Bill goes into a rant about how that’s totally uncool. “The light will change, you wait for it, don’t be pressing the button.”  I can’t decide if he’s right or just annoying.

We head back to my apartment,  to what seems like a long night ahead.  A Super-IceTea-Gulper and two donuts provide plenty of energy for Bill to continue on the computer, phone and now the TV.  We’re inching close to “Jeopardy” and he wants to watch.

I’m a Jeopardy neophyte but the first round of “Jeopardy” questions are about the Argentine pampas and I seem to know all the answers. Bill is shaken by my initial Jeopardy supremacy but  bounces back later on with the underdog contestant who finally gets a head start and unexpectedly wins.

I rarely watch TV anymore, especially a game show, so the novelty starts to fade when “Jeopardy” segues easily into “Wheel of Fortune” and a request for more food from Bill.

Sitting on my couch, Bill announces that he’s hungry and inquires if I have any menus laying around. I tell him no, I don’t have menus because I don’t order food in.  Undeterred, he gets on his IPhone and searches for local food.  He finds “More Café”. He orders spicy chicken wings, avocado roll and a spicy tuna roll for me. Expected delivery time: half an hour.

Now, we’re into a comedy, that is a comedy movie that is playing on my TV.  The TV that Bill points out is really the size of a computer screen and I should really own something larger. Then, he makes a comment about my walls being bare. 

The night continues. Sometime around 10:30PM or 11:00PM, I tell Bill that he really must leave, that I’m tired. Bill acknowledges, shrugs, says goodbye, and leaves.

Friday night around 7PM I receive a text from Bill.  He writes “I did better on Jeopardy tonight”.